Friday, July 21, 2006

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Don't know why I picked this movie, precisely, but I did. Some thoughts.

"What if it breaks?"
"Do you really care right now?"


I mean, really - sometimes I think, shouldn't I worry?... but if I don't care right now, why should I? Why ruin the moment?

"Happy. Just exactly where I wanna be."

Because that is so much more; it is a gift.

"I'm just a fucked up girl who's looking for my peace of mind. Don't assign me yours."

Aren't we all? At the end of the day, all this is just a way to try and make sense of everything we percieve. It doesn't even really matter what the truth is, so much as it matters to be able to live with how things seem to be, and whatever way we end up describing it.

"Thank God, someone normal who doesn't know how to interact with these things either"

I feel like that a lot...

"This is it Joel, it's gonna be gone soon."
"I know."
"What do we do?"
"Enjoy it."


There's a difference, I think, between when an end is coming soon, or otherwise finite, versus the knowledge that things might end at any time. There might be a new urgency. Or there might not.

"You'll find things wrong and i'll get bored because that's what happens."
"Okay."


That could be said at the beginning of every relationship, couldn't it.

Why not?
Anything might happen - anything! So it might all fall apart... so what? So what?

"How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd."


"Blessed are the forgetful: for they shall have done with their stupidities too."

As I watched, I loved Clementine's fresh face to the world, her impulsiveness. I've been having a lot of fun lately, and really a life fully lived, by being just... impulsive. Having adventures. Letting simple things, like walking the two blocks to church, be adventures, worlds unfolding, every moment new.

And I liked the fearlessness. Life, everything, all our present hopes, might fall apart down the line. Probably will, in fact. And in accepting that is the most freedom to run it to the hilt... to risk what may come.

Yeah, sure, I'm doing this already, hit a rough spot this week... so the best summary is this: it was encouraging.

4 comments:

Jim said...

It is hard for a young person to see past their physical reach, no matter how hard they try. That is not their fault, not trying might be.

Meanwhile the elders bury their heads in the rote and usual, not trying. In general.

It all adds up to 'illusions' lived while reality goes on around them all.

The problem is that there really is a true reality, a one perspective reality. Life can be lived struggling against it, easy road but hard, or, one can struggle to know. Everyone gets to chose. In the end you are your choice.

Jim said...

sorry, 'chose' s/b 'choose'.

CE said...

There is nothing wrong with being fearless. The problem is when you suppress fear thinking you should be fearless. Fear of fear is worse than fear itself.
There will be times when you will be afraid and you think that you shouldn't be and that you should try to get rid of it by all means.
If you are never afraid, it could mean you are conforming a lot. Just an idea. Nothing personal.

anonymous julie said...

Imemine, that's an interesting thought. Fear is a strange beast; examining the situation usually is effective in abating fear. Fear, for me, tends to be of the unknown; a known and managed risk is just that; the outcomes are considered, nothing to worry about, just watching it play out.